First Day of School Mugshot
Why not take first day of school pictures the right way? Kids feel like it’s jail, so let’s go all in.
Where do sandwiches even live?
See. This person gets it. Why go hunting when I don’t even know where sandwiches live? I don’t need to go track down something, kill it, clean it, cook it, and then make it into a sandwich when I could just go to the restaurant and get one.
Why Pinterest is Better Than Facebook
You may not think that Pinterest is that great of a site, but all you do over there is look at pictures of food. The political crap is buried under piles and piles of cookies.
UFO Caught On Tape
Believe it or not, they caught a UFO on tape! It wasn’t that hard either. You just needed a UFO drawing and some tape. It’s like magic! The advances in technology have gotten us nowhere.
Don’t think. Just do.
Probably the worst advice ever is to don’t think, just do. If you run a business, then you deserve to go out of business.
Hiking Tip: Lost? Stay where you are because we don’t like you.
Just kidding! If you get lost, staying where you are increases your odds of being found. So don’t go wandering around. Just wait and we’ll come to you.
If it takes someone a long time to explain something, they’re full of shit.
You can only explain something for so long. If the other person isn’t understanding, then just make shit up. They’ll never know.
I See Minions Everywhere
I don’t know about you, but I’m seeing Minions everywhere. Even fire hydrants are looking like the little yellow guys. I think this one is a girl Minion.
There are no shortcuts on the road to success.
No matter how hard you try, you can’t take a shortcut to success. Especially when you try to go under a bridge that is too short for you. Looks like someone should have taken their own advice.
Even Unicorns Get Cavities
Don’t forget to brush your teeth every morning. Not only does it keep your breath smelling fresh, but it also keeps the dentist away.