Smile. It will either warm their hearts or piss them off. Either way you win.
Lifes too short to worry about everyone and their stupid opinions. Just smile and see what happens.
Quotes
Oh Shit. PLOT TWIST!
When something goes wrong in your life, just yell “PLOT TWIST!” and move on. Even when things don’t go wrong, if you’re just board, yet it and change your life. Keep it interesting!
In heaven there is no beer that’s why we drink it here.
Wait a minute….. there’s no beer in heaven? Says who? I’m calling shenanigans.
A woman drove me to drink and I didn’t even have the decency to thank her.
It’s the best thing she ever did for me.
Like nice things but wish a tiny lion would knock them over? Get a cat!
There’s nothing like a cat. They have all the confidence in the world. They’re cunning & clumsy at the same time. Plus they don’t give a shit about you most of the time. Unless they’re hungry or want to be petted. Then you better be ready to listen! Love those little fur balls!
Some Angels Are Devils In Disguise.
Not you though. You don’t even need a disguise. I can see right through you.
When in Doubt, Remember FISH: Fuck It, Shit Happens
Not every day is going to go right. So when things go wrong, just yell FISH and leave.
Shut Your Pie Hole Pie
What’s better than pie? Pie with a purpose. This is really easy to make too. Just make pie and instead of putting crust over the top, lay the crust out flat and use cookie cutters to cut out the letters. Then bake and serve to your friends.
My iPhone Corrects Me Just As Much As My Wife
Look iPhone, if I wanted to be constantly corrected today, I would have stayed home with my wife.
