Think of the animals. The puppies and kitties. Think of the tears you will cry. Think of the sadness you will feel. Man, that’d work so good. It doesn’t get much worse than those...
Everyone loves Skymall, or at least they do every time they fly. How great would a Skymall movie be? It’d be like 007 meets Inspector Gadget! Only the gadgets would be a bit strange...
That’s right, I’m the thoughtful boyfriend you can’t live without. Enjoy.
I have to say, I’ve been over thinking this getting dressed thing. Ladies only need pants and guys only need shirts. Just pull them up or down and you’re all set! Simplify!
What more could a woman want? Great abs, doesn’t leave me to drink beer with the guys, and loves to go shopping. That’s a womans best friend right there.
Shopping = Awesome. Current events, not so much.
Christmas is nearly here. Time to battle off the last-minute shoppers and claim victory!
Now get the fuck out of my way as I have some god damn Christmas shopping to do!
Grocery shopping got you down? Make it a little more fun by adding a skateboard to your cart. Escalators not as fun as they use to be? Take the slide! Vroom Vroom Weeeeeeee
Be careful when out shopping this year. Not only with trespassers be shot, but so will any survivors. Man these black Friday sales are getting dangerous.