Spider in your bed? Coffee can fix that.
I’m not sure if you need to burn down your whole house because you found a spider in your bed, but if you do, coffee is there for you.
Signs
Hot Shingles In Your Area Looking To Get Nailed
Some people in marketing are lame, others are amazing. I’d hire this shingle company even if I didn’t need my roof redone.
Anybody Have Plans To Stare At Their Phone Somewhere Exciting This Weekend?
Not like it matters. My phone looks awesome no matter where I am.
You should really do that thing you said you’d do.
You should do what you said you were going to do that one time before you got all tired and then got super busy and pretty much forgot… you really should.
An atheist, a vegan, and a crossfitter walk into a bar…
Know how I know? Because they all told me within 2 minutes! Seems those things are something to brag about.
Did you read Apples Terms and Conditions? Neither did Adam and Eve.
So many words in those pesky terms and conditions documents. What could possibly go wrong if you just agree and then do whatever you want?
Come in for drinks. Keep walking and then what? Bears!?
Either stop in for drinks or keep walking and risk it all. What’s further down the street? Who knows, maybe bears, or a mugger, or real life! Better not chance it.
Baby on Board. Literally.
Ever see a car with a baby on board sign? How about one with an actual baby on a board?!