Ah, Thanksgiving—the one day a year when we gather around the table, stuff our faces, and pretend that “family bonding” doesn’t include passive-aggressive comments about your cousin’s weird haircut. And right at the center of it all… turkey.
But why turkey? Did the Pilgrims sit around in 1621 saying, “Hmm… shall we have turkey today, or maybe chicken?” Not exactly. Wild birds were probably there, sure, but no one bothered to write a Yelp review.
Fast-forward a couple of hundred years, and a lady named Sarah Josepha Hale basically said, “Turkey is the only bird worthy of a proper Thanksgiving feast.” Everyone agreed, because nothing says “festive” like carving a giant, slightly awkward bird in front of people you only see a few times a year.
And now here we are, generations later, still wrestling with the same bird, while our stuffing quietly judges our life choices from the side of the plate. The turkey is big, awkward, and a little dry, but honestly, isn’t that kind of like Thanksgiving itself?
So carve that bird, pour the gravy, dodge your uncle’s political opinions, and remember: we eat turkey not because of some ancient Pilgrim decree, but because someone decided it was easier than trying to roast a cow in the living room.
Happy Turkey Day, everyone!