LOL Zombie

I’ll eat bacon when pigs fry.

So pretty much anytime.

Spoiled Milk

Now this is a super bowl.

No football required.

Coffee is a warm delicious drug.

Good mornings only happen after you get your fix.

If life gives you melons, you may be dyslexic.

They say life is all about how you look at it, but no one is giving you melons. Lemons maybe, but not melons.

Your phone only needs two buttons: Batman & Pizza

Everything else is unimportant.

OMG! You killed my hot dog.

You bastard.

In case of fire, break glass and roast marshmallow.

If you’re going to have a fire, might as well get some enjoyment out of it.

Would you like ice cream or sherbert?

Ohh Ernie, you so funny.

Practice safe lunch. Use a condiment.

You can’t be to careful these days.